Recently a road trip brought me back to where I resided for 12+ years and had many life experiences.
This was the place I really became me: rented my first house, worked, made a name for myself, got married, and became a widow.
Driving through the area brought back memories which I processed in open eye trance. Just seeing the town sign and being near the area brought back memories and made me uneasy. But a speaker I listened to recently said, “Are you doing your own work? If not, get out of the business!”
Well, what an opportunity! So I decided then and there to do my own work; to change the memories and how being there made me feel, it was going to be a wonderful day!
My husband and I did the business which had made the trip necessary and then headed to a nearby disk golf course in Montevideo, MN.
This disk golf course brought back good memories of my current husband and I. We had a great time and even found a disk, making up for the one we lost last year!
Our next stop brought us to Dawson, MN, the town where I attended grief counseling and met a very kind therapist, who helped me through a lot! My good friend, Carleen, worked in Dawson at the funeral home; she’s passed on as well. But there’s a great little thrift store on Main Street. It’s a neat little town and slice of Midwest Minnesota Americana. Stop by the town if your passing through the area.
More good memories!
After getting one disk stuck in a tree, my husband and I made good memories getting it down. I climbed the tree and it brought back memories of climbing the basswood tree at grandmas house. This memory helped me climb high enough to get the disk unstuck. I got scraped up a bit, but we really had fun!
Our next stop was Clarkfield, MN. This is the place I became me and also fell apart. If you ever pass through, stop by the grocery store and the cafe. Tell them Jessica sent you. Someone will know who your talking about! It’s a great place to live by the way. The kind of place that grows on you. One of the few last small towns out there. More great Midwest Minnesota Americana!
Of course we stopped by the grocery store! Nothing had changed, it was just how I left it the day grief hit and I left. Open eye trance again!
A lot of good memories in that small grocery store! I loved working there and loved getting to know the customers! It felt good to walk in and say hi to my old boss. “The place looks the same but isn’t the same without you”, my boss said, “Lots of people still talk about you and tell me they see you from time to time in Willmar.”
It was good to hear those words! I was not okay when I left Clarkfield after my husband’s death. A lot of stuff happened and I wasn’t sure of much at the time. It was great to stop by and hear those words!
Stopping by the cemetery, open eyed trance, still seemed like he died yesterday but a long time ago. It was very surreal. I could see this strange mix of then and now, like over exposed photos overlapping.
My husband gave me a moment and I stood at the headstone in open eye trance letting the memories loop in my mind. When I had processed it, I saw a peaceful cemetery and a stone with my late husband’s name on it. Tears filled my eyes, there was so much I wanted to tell him, but he’s not there, so I said, “thank you”.
Then turning to my husband, he stood by my side and I felt grateful, both men had changed my life for the better and I theirs.
I said, “It still seems surreal, we were still newlyweds and we just didn’t have enough time together.”
With grateful tears in my eyes, I took my husbands hand, took a breath, said, “ready”, and we walked to the car.
One last stop on our drive was the Granite Falls disk golf course. And yes, more open eyed trance! This was the town with the hospital where the ambulance took my husband the day of the stroke. It’s the town I became a different person in that day! But somehow it felt good to be back there now. That place changed me for the best!
We ate supper on the banks of the river in the grass, then played disk golf.
New memories were made and old ones became more healed. I am a work in progress, passionate about hypnosis.
Open eye trance happens to all of us. Ever see a car like the one you had your first kiss in? Or drive by the place you had that great time at? Or hear a song that made you remember? That’s open eye trace in a nutshell.
When those painful memories from the past come up, you are in open eye trance. Allow yourself space to begin to process, change, and put the memories in the past, so you can live open eye trance now, as you create new memories and have new experiences.
Take that road trip and heal from your past!
Jessica L Hanson CHt. LLC